Returned

thanks to all the kinds of games i was playing,

for a long time i wrote nothing,

i used to be a semi armature blogger of my own kind,

but from last night,

i felt i need to write again,

near two years have passed from my last post on my blog,

during these twisted dark days and longer nights,

that nothings came out or i myself prevented it to be written,

i felt the cold grasp of death around my neck that was chocking me,

in nights, i was looking for somewhere like a bar to drunk myself on it to be able to go to sleep without any pain, that bar was my PC and there was plenty of choices of liquor on it, Puzzles, MMO, RPG, Tower Deffence,.. from all the good brands,

it was good for that night, it work perfectly to make me pacified for a night,

but the problem would start again from the god damn morning, while i was on the way to work...

each day, i ate my anger, my hatred, the bitter feeling of being not satisfied with what i am now, i tried to forget all of those bad feelings, i tried to make them disappear by not looking on them,

but with such action,

i made the chain of dissatisfaction stronger and longer.

my mind was too busy that has no time to think about my own problems, because it was dedicated to solve all the kind of puzzles and quests,

it was like you cant have enough air to breath, like chocking.

well,

i think that's enough,

i want to change that,

also,

i think after long time i wrote something good that make me feel better :D

"I'm Still Thirsthey - Fereydoun"

آب، اگرچه بی صدا ترین ترانه بود، تشنگی بهانه بود.

Aab, agar-che bi-sedaa tarin taraane bood, teshnegi, bahaane bood.

Although water, was the most silent melody, thirst was the excuse.

من به خوابهای کوچک تو، اعتماد داشتم. چشمهای کوچک تو را، به یاد داشتم.

Man be khaab-haaye koochake to, etenaad daashtam. chashm-haaye aasheghe to raa, be yaad daashtam.
 
I trusted in your little dreams, I remembered your loving eyes.

می وزید عطر سیب، سوی خوابهای ساده و نجیب.

mivazid atre sib, sooye khaab-haaye saade va najib.
 
The smell of apple was in the air, to simple and gentle dreams.

من در هوای عطر موی تو، در رفت و آمد کبود گاهواره ها، زیر چتر روشن ستاره ها.

man dar havaaye atre mooye to, dar rafto aamade kaboode gaah-vaare-ha, zire chatre roshane setaare-ha.
 
In searching for you, in the scent of your hair, I was like gray footwork of time walking under bright umbrella of stars.

تا هنوز عاشقم، تا هنوز صبر میکنم.

taa hanooz aashegham, taa hanooz sabr mikonam.
 
I’m in love since always, I’ll wait till always.

ابر میرسد، باد مویه میکند، چکه چکه از جلوی ناودان، یاس تازه می دمد.

abr miresad, baad mooye mikonad. cheke cheke az jelo-ye naavdan, yaas taaze midamad.
 
Cloud arrives, and wind weeps, in front of rain-spout drip by drip, fresh jasmine blossoms.

تا هنوز تشنه ام، تا هنوز تشنگی بهانه است، آب بی صدا ترین ترانه است.

taa hanooz teshne-am, taa hanooz teshnegi bahaane ast, aab, bi-sedaatarin taraane ast.
 
Till I am thirsty, till thirst is the excuse, water is the most Silent melody.

تا هنوز عاشقم، تا هنوز صبر میکنم.

taa hanooz aashegham, taa hanooz sabr mikonam.
 
I’m in love since always, I’ll wait till always.

Album : AZ TO DOORAM (I'm away from you)

by : Fereydoun Asaraye

Translated by : Machinarium Boy

Review on "Gothika" and "Suspect Zero" : is killing a killer, bring justice?

Let’s start with likenesses;

Both have lost people, missing kids, both contain meta physic elements, both related to supper natural events, both are talking about way of transferring data like telepathy

And now differences from my point of view:

Suspect Zero: the medium is trained, he can see real events, with so many details, chain of logical events makes you believe this is possible, and in total have better logical story.

Gothika: the medium is untrained, she feels things based on communication with ghosts, it is not certain and so events go on chaotically, and story is more emotional.

Let’s talk about justice. What is it? How can someone who killed more than one people get justice by dying once? How can a mother who spent her life to raise a child get justice? I think justice meaning is not only punishment, I believe it has more meaning on this word. It is about making even. I mean you did a good thing your justice will be good thing and if you did badly your justice will comes bad. In these days, people say this in new way. They say doing good thing, or even thinking well, is a positive energy and based on the “energy or material will never get vanquished, but they will change their form and turn into each other or change their shapes.” Rule, your good energy will come back to you in karma and you will use it again. It is same about bad energy too. And it is justice in physics language. But I still want to argue about how this justice will happen on upper examples…

 And in the end “Suspect Zero” ending SUX, while “Gothika” ending ROX

By: Machinariom Boy

Review on "Lake House" - What is love looks like?

Lake House,
Sweetest Love, Like a Beautiful Smell, Like Magic, Like Beauty.
There is a meaning in waiting, not everyone can understand it but those who can, are different. They know the true love is not easy, it will cost you, it will need sacrifices, and the price you will pay is how much you believe in love.
Love is like Lake House, when you are in love you can’t hide it, whatever you do, it will appear because its love.

For love...

by : Machinariom Boy
Edited : 4th Aug 2012

"I'm Away from you - Fereydoun"

چون پاره سنگی عاشقم، به گنجشکی هراسان، و هر بار نا امید برمیگردم به خاک، برمیگردم به خویش، نا امید و نیازمند، زبانه میکشد آغوشم به سویت.

Chon paare-sangi aashegham, be gonjeshki haraasan, va har baar naa-omid, barmigardam be khaak, barmigardam be khish, naa-omid o niaazmand, zabaane mikeshad aaghoosham be sooyat.

I'm like a small stone who is in love with a frightened sparrow, and each time I come back to soil disappointed, I come back to myself, disappointed and in need, my hands are flying towards you.

از تو دور افتادم، از تو دور افتادم. در بی مجالی و لالی، به کاغذ آتش رسیده می مانم، جدا شده ایی از نخ نگاهم، چون بادکنک ماه.

az to door oftaadam, az to door oftaadam, dar bi majaali va laali, be kaaghaze aatash reside mimaanam, jodaa shode ee az nakhe negahaam, chon baadkonak maah.

I was left behind from you, in no words and no time, like a paper that fear from fire. You have forsaken my eyes, like a moon balloon that dropped in a full moon night.

سالهاست از کرشمه باران تو میگذرم، بی چتر و بارانی، در سایه پنهان میشوم، در گریه پیدا. هر چه هستم از تو دورم، دور، دور، دور، دور، هر چه هستم از تو دورم، دور، دور، دور.

saalhast az kereshme baarane to migozaram, bi chatro baarani, dar saaye penhaan mishavam, dar gerye peidaa. har che hastam az to dooram, door, door, door, door, har che hastam az to dooram, door, door, door.

I'm walking in rain of your Coquetry for years, without umbrella and coat, I hide in shadows and appear in cries, whatever I am, I’m far away from you, I’m away from you, far, far, far, far, whatever I am, I’m far away from you, far, far, far.

Album : AZ TO DOORAM (I'm away from you)

by : Fereydoun Asaraye

Translated by : Machinarium Boy